Saturday, March 21, 2015

Being Together


The past one year, the entire 2014, was pretty travel heavy for me. I was flying in and out of the country every month spending 2-3 weeks outside and only 1-2 weeks at home. It was taking a toll on a lot of things – my health, my relationship with my pregnant wife and my state of happiness in general.

I wasn't able to give my wife as much time as I wanted to and she desired … that too at a crucial juncture of life. There were so many times I was visiting the doctor either just before flying out or right after landing. There were times when I missed the appointment or an important sonography since I was not in the country.

I was getting extremely uncomfortable with this mode of living and this phase of my career. I needed a job which kept me with my family. At least with my wife, if not parents. If it could give me a geographical stable role in Mumbai … where I could stay with my parents and wife (and kids); I would love to take it up.

But alas, jobs don't really come your way when you need one. Those which came did not really fit my profile. A couple of interviews I gave, I ended up telling the interviewers about my unsuitability for the role. Appreciated – yes. Job offer – of course, No

Some of the jobs which could give me that … would result in a sharp decline in my salary. Those 'stable' desk jobs would never be able to match up even 75% of my consulting salary. That's where things were not moving ahead.


And then my daughter was born.   


I had returned from Kuwait on 15th May and she was born the very next day (I almost missed it – but thankfully didn't). I spend most part of the week in the nursing home by my wife and daughter.

As much as I looked at both of them, the pangs of forthcoming separation would strike me.

And then another Kuwait trip happened and then another and then another.

It was around the month of October when I returned from the 4th trip after my daughter's birth. She was 5 months old now and she could recognize the faces of the family members.

When I came home from the airport and held her in my arms, expecting there to be a sign of recognition or a glimmer of a smile … all I got was a blank expression from here. An almost confused look.

I mentioned that someone in the house mentioned that since I was away for 3 weeks; she might have forgotten me.

I did not sleep that night.

That statement had struck me like a sledgehammer.

I spent the next 3 days at home with my daughter - Building familiarity with her. She again began to recognize me and smile at me. Those 3 days were almost life changing for me.

The resolve to move away from the consulting job strengthened and every time I looked at my daughter's lovely face, I was filled with hope, optimism and positive vibe for the future.

I decided to take some hard and aggressive concrete action towards my job search and I began the same. Within a month, exactly on my birthday in November, I gave myself the gift of a resignation from my current job.

I knew that together with family, I could brave any storm in my career and my earnings. Family was the most important aspect of my life and I was giving it a priority. I was pushing away the career which could give me wealth for a chance to live a happier life.

Well … as luck would have it. Very soon, I got a job opportunity which kind of offered me a decent salary (so I did not really have to forego my salary levels in the end). Unfortunately, I am currently away from my family but it is temporary state of 2-3 months … after which I will be staying with my wife and kid without any separation on regular basis. BLISS.

The only hitch is that I did not get the job in my hometown so I won't be living with my parents now. We will be going to our hometown to spend a week or two, every 4 months. Maybe, we don't get everything that we want. But we do get something.   

Those 3 days spent with my daughter gave me hope and optimism, which fired up some courage cells in my head which helped me take some action and resign within a month from a job which was no longer making me happy. believes in the inimitable power of optimism. They know that it's difficult to be optimistic all day, every day; and at times we need a little nudge to get back on track! This is the time we need to be with the ones we love the most. It could also be the simple act of meeting a long lost friend, having a cup of tea with a parent, or going for a walk with your best friend. Most times, it's the company that matters more than the advice, and that is the power of being #together!

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