Thursday, September 16, 2004

Something about Payal !

Today is 16th Sept. Let me tell you about yet another special person in my Life.
Payal ; my batch mate and the Shortest sweetest kid member in our G7.

I am a pretty cool person. I dont get angry. I dont take tension of any damn thing. I dont worry much about things. But yes, I do get iritated at times. on the whole, a very cool person who can be found usually in a very optimistic mood.

The past few weeks I noticed some change in me. I was going a bit low on tolerance. And that too only when it came to MastishK. Things were happening around me which were not exactly agreeable to me. I was unhappy. I was slightly disturbed. I realised that I was LOUD most of the times. I was in a state of dissapointment most of the times.

With exams on coming Monday, less than a week left, pressures were mounting on all. I was woried about MastishK. I never realised but MastishK had become my life in the past 3 months. I was with MastishK 24X7 ... literally.

Yesterday, I and Payal were out on the pond side on our routine evening after-snack walk. I was telling her about my dissatisfaction with the current happenings. I have been sharing with her my feelings in the past several days.

I felt I was getting Frustrated. I am not a type of person who would get frustrated so easily. But I was feeling it. I realised that I am at a juncture where my down hill journey is going to begin.

I was filled with dissapointment. i was getting irritated too easily. I was finding each of my ideas being shot down. Yes, each one of them. There was communication problem between me and Nikhil. We were somehow not understanding each others point of view and were having major dis-agreements.

There was darkness all around me (inside me)

Payal had been sensing this from several days. She spoke. She was direct. She kinda woke me up from my MastishK Slumber. She made me realise all the things I have written above. She made me realise that I needed to take charge of my life again. Right now, MastishK was in charge. I needed to put My MastishK and Myself in the drivers seat.

She did not say anything out of this world to me. It was all known to me.

BUT, if I have to light a candle in a dark room, i need a match-stick to light it up and to search a match-stick ; i need light which is already not there. I was in a similar state. I was surrounded in darkness and I cud not access my own wisdom. She pierced thro' the darkness and showed me some light.

She prevented me from going on the down-hill journey.

As this happened . . . I was reminded that Exactly One Year Five Days ago ...i.e. 10th September 2003; she had earlier done something very similar to me.

It was the Day Zero of Summer Placements for us, a lot of pre-processes were already done. Company after Company Short Lists were coming out and my name was very conspicuous its absence.

Towards the evening; 16-17 Companies had already issued their short lists and i was not in any list. No one was inviting me for a GD or a PI. Only 2/3 companies were left to announce their short list. I spent the whole day woith people; encouraging them, motivating them, wishing them luck, pedicting their short-listing / interview / selection (I was pretty good at that time. Lot of predictions turned out to be true.)

I was kinda getting dissapointed. I mean, I had never had trouble getting shortlisted in either Campus Interviews in Final Year of Engg. nor for MBA admissions ... moreover I cleared all of them. But here, I was facing a situation where I was not even crossing the first hurdle of even being given a chance to perfoem in a GD. The dissappointment & frustration had just set in when my name was announced.

Finally someone had short-listed me. But I was not in mood. I was already in the first gear on the downhill journey. Payal was on my side at that moment. She encouraged me. She said very few words. But they were enough to shake me back into reality and the REAL ME.

I washed my face and came out fresh. I decided that "I was not at all interested in giving many Interviews. I had to crack that one. I went in with my Most Positive ME ... and yup ... was given a spot offer for the summers with the company. i wouldn't have been able to do it had Payal been absent from the scene on that day. Me, the Motivator, actually needed that boost of motivation which she gave me at the critical moment.

Two occasions ... exactly one year apart (what a coincidence) ... Both occasions ... i was on the verge of getting in to the "frustrated" mode ...Both occasions she was by my side ... showing me light in darkness ... She made a big differnce in my life.

Thanks dear. You are a GEM of a friend !

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