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Monday, August 18, 2008

HILARIOUS DIVORCE LETTER

Got this as a forward and thought of putting it here ... a touch of humour !!

Dear Wife:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I'vebeen a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that youquit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new haircut,had cooked your favourite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silkboxers. You ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watchingall of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't wantsex or anything that connects us as husband and wife. Either you'recheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case,
I'm gone.
Your EX-Husband

P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to WestVirginia together! Have a great life!
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Dear Ex-Husband -
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that youand I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cryfrom what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown outyour constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.

I DID noticewhen you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that came to mind was"You look just like a girl!" Since my mother raised me not to say anythingif you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked myfavourite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because Istopped eating pork seven years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it was a coincidence that mysister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning. After all ofthis, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I hitthe lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two ticketsto Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for areason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said thatthe letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed,Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was bornCarl. I hope that's not a problem.


Smile !!

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